Pleasantries To Fake Cordiality

Raj(16) goes to a Government school in our village where the medium of education is Tamil, which is the local language and his mother tongue.  All his school books are in Tamil, except of course the English book. One day he came to me asking for help with an English poem in his school book. It was titled "Once upon a time'.   This poem was written by a Nigerian poet called Gabriel Okara. Here the poet laments about our fast-changing society which is losing its values. He admits conforming to the new fake ways of interacting with others. He pleads with his son to teach him to be authentic and live like a child again.

***

Once Upon A Time

Once upon a time, son,
they used to laugh with their hearts
and laugh with their eyes:
but now they only laugh with their teeth,
while their ice-block-cold eyes
search behind my shadow.

There was a time indeed
they used to shake hands with their hearts:
but that’s gone, son.
Now they shake hands without hearts
while their left hands search
my empty pockets.

‘Feel at home!’ ‘Come again’:
they say, and when I come
again and feel
at home, once, twice,
there will be no thrice-
for then I find doors shut on me.

So I have learned many things, son.
I have learned to wear many faces
like dresses – homeface,
officeface, streetface, hostface,
cocktailface, with all their conforming smiles
like a fixed portrait smile.

And I have learned too
to laugh with only my teeth
and shake hands without my heart.
I have also learned to say,’Goodbye’,
when I mean ‘Good-riddance’:
to say ‘Glad to meet you’,
without being glad; and to say ‘It’s been
nice talking to you’, after being bored.

But believe me, son.
I want to be what I used to be
when I was like you. I want
to unlearn all these muting things.
Most of all, I want to relearn
how to laugh, for my laugh in the mirror
shows only my teeth like a snake’s bare fangs!

So show me, son,
how to laugh; show me how
I used to laugh and smile
once upon a time when I was like you.

 ***

In Raj's book, at the end of this poem there is a list of questions for the students. One of them is:
"What pleasantries does the poet use to fake cordiality?"

When I read this for the first time, I faltered when I encountered "pleasantries".  Honestly, that was the very first time I had encountered this word. Although I guessed its meaning based on the context, I didn't know what it exactly meant until I looked up online. To any non-English speaking student, who goes to a non-English medium school these English words are as alien as Chinese or Greek. I know that these children here have never come across these words ever before in their lives.

Now, what are the chances of a teacher in a Tamil medium school knowing all the words in this question? Let us assume that the teacher came prepared to school to "teach" this poem, for there is a glossary at the end of the poem. But there is no way of getting the answer right since there is no glossary for the questions themselves! Ultimately this question gets ignored by everyone including the teacher. Such questions are not so innocuous though. I think they have the potential to sow the seeds of inadequacy in the reader.

The poem itself is in simple, non-intimidating language. Ironically the question is not. Even if the reader could understand and appreciate the poem, this question is capable of shaking that understanding. It makes me wonder what the agenda of  this "education" is.

-- Hema